Motorcycles that are a huge waste of money

Motorcycles come in all shapes and sizes, and it doesn't matter if you're short or tall, fast or slow, there is something out there for you. And most of the time it doesn't need to cost an arm and a leg. For the price of an average family sedan, you can get a top of the range bike that will make all your friends jealous, and that's just the start, because for the most part more money equals more performance. But if you're not careful, or not particularly bright, you might find yourself buying performance you can't use—or worse. a bike you'll never want to take out of the garage. If you're in the market for something more upmarket, but don't want to waste your money, here are a few bikes you might want to avoid.

Suzuki AEM Carbon Fiber Hayabusa

The Suzuki Hayabusa was released in 1999 and immediately claimed the title of the world's fastest production motorcycle, reaching speeds of over 188 miles per hour, a distinction it holds to this day. And in spite of the tire-shredding speeds it's capable of, it's still reported to be a well-behaved road bike. But for some people, the words "well-behaved" means that Suzuki left something on the production floor, and those people won't stop till they get more. Which is where the AEM Carbon Fiber Hayabusa comes in. The carbon fiber Hayabusa is just that: a Hayabusa where as many parts as possible have been made with carbon fiber. This reduces weight significantly, but adds to the price even more. Where a regular Hayabusa can be had for just over $15,000 new, the carbon fiber Hayabusa will set you back over $160,000…which is about $150,000 more performance than most people will ever need.

MV Agusta F4 CC

The F4 CC is a limited edition 200 horsepower Italian superbike that retails at $120,000. It is just one of a whole stable of F4 bikes made by MV Agusta since 1999, all of which are beautiful visions on two wheels. Designed to not only look good, but also race, the F4s can tear up the track with the best of them. But don't think the F4 CC is representative of the group. While the CC outclasses the earlier models considerably, the later production models have almost identical stats, but with a much healthier price tag. The 2011 RR model, for example, retails for just over $26,000, actually offers slightly more horsepower, and makes the F4 CC look like a good way to waste money.

Confederate B120 Wraith

The B120 Wraith is extolled for its unique design and construction, which incorporates carbon fiber and other materials in new and unusual ways. But there's only one catch: it's really ugly. A creation of Confederate Motorcycles, the Wraith is an attempt to redefine what a motorcycle should be, and that's to be applauded. Unfortunately while the design innovation is no doubt unique, it is also totally graceless. Looking more like a collection of distracted doodles than a finished design, the circles, curves, and other shapes don't so much compliment, as just kinda hang out near each other. And the back end appears to have been completely forgotten after the rear wheel was sketched in. Appearance aside, the Wraith has other issues, not least a 1966 cc engine that generates a slightly pathetic 125 horsepower. That's a huge engine for a motorcycle, but they must have chosen it for how it looked on the bike, because it's certainly not doing much work. Confederate Motorcycles were asking $92,000 for the B120 Wraith, and at that price, you'd think they would throw in a windscreen and a couple of fairings.

Harley Davidson Cosmic Starship

Good reasons for a high price tag on a motorcycle are high quality, great performance, and amazing design. A bad reason is that some guy painted all over it. But that's what happened to one poor Harley Davidson V-rod that may never allow itself to appear in public again. So-called artist Jack Armstrong, a self described "Cosmic Extensionalist," painted the hog in a garish yellow and red color scheme, then slapped a $1 million price tag on it. A V-rod normally retails for around $16,000, so that unnecessary layer of casually applied paint costs $984,000. Surely if anyone is a fan of both Harley Davidson motorcycles and Jack Armstrong paintings, they could just buy the bike and the painting separately. Then they can have the pleasure of owning both a classic American work of art, and an incentive to get out of the house and ride it as much as possible.

Ecosse Spirit ES1

The exotically named Ecosse Spirit was the brainchild of McLaren F1 designer Dick Glover, who with the help of Farrari F1 designer Andy le Fleming aimed to revolutionize the development of high performance motorbikes by incorporating F1 design methodologies. The aim was to achieve significant aerodynamic improvements by repackaging the internal layout to allow the bike and rider to fit together in a narrower aerodynamic profile. The project was announced with great fanfare in 2007 and promised to slash lap times by reducing weight and drag. But despite initial excitement and interest, after several years the only bike the team had produced was a non-functioning wind tunnel test model. And while it's a bit of a tragedy that such an awesome concept never really saw the light of day, at a projected price of $3.6 million, it would have been a complete waste of money.

MTT Y2K Turbine Streetfighter

There are two ways to make a motorcycle faster: make it as light and as aerodynamic as possible…or forget that and put a jet engine in it. Which is what Marine Turbine Technologies decided to do when they built the Y2K. MTT initially used a rebuilt Rolls Royce-Allison model 250-C18 gas turbine engines producing 320 horsepower, before upgrading to a 420 horsepower version in the next generation Streetfighter model. Unlike previous jet powered bikes, the Y2K doesn't have the ability to burn holes in nearby vehicles, because the power is routed through a conventional two speed gearbox to the rear wheel like an ordinary bike. So apart from a very loud and distinctive wail, the Y2K is otherwise fairly normal…if you think of a road legal bike hitting 227 miles per hour as "normal." The price tag of $175,000 is somewhat mitigated by the Streetfighter's unusual ability to consume whatever fuel you happen to have lying around. But if you're able to spend the cash equivalent of a new house on a two wheeled crotch rocket, fuel prices probably aren't your first concern.

Dodge Tomahawk

The Dodge Tomahawk is a concept motorcycle that saw limited production, but was never actually street legal, and that's a really good thing. Because the Tomahawk is to motorcycles what the screaming four year old in the supermarket is to well behaved kids: a very annoying and pointless cry for attention. The bike is a mashup of ideas that belong on a car, including the V10 engine from a Dodge Viper, two wheels instead of one at the front and back, and a literally impossible claimed top speed of 420 miles per hour on a bike with no screen, or any actual aerodynamic considerations to speak of. Thees are all features that can be explained by the fact that Dodge doesn't make bikes, and the only way they can is by designing a car then making it narrower. This bike was originally built as a concept vehicle for publicity purposes, but replicas were eventually made and sold for $555,000 each. According to Forbes, up to ten replicas were intended to be sold. But how many actually left the factory is unknown. There can't be that many prepubescent boys with half a million dollars to burn.

Ludovic Lazareth LM847

One of the most insane-looking street-legal motorcycles around, the Ludovic Lazareth LM847 features a ludicrous 470 horsepower, the ability to hit speeds over 200 MPH, and four wheels that let you lean into 30-degree turns. You might recognize all of these as qualities you absolutely do not need in a motorcycle, and yet the Lazareth boasts all of them.

Amazingly, according to Digital Trends, Lazareth designed this monster-cycle not because people need such specs (they don't) but simply because it looks awesome. And to be fair, it does. It looks like something out of a movie. But sadly, it seems like they also made it to get rich, judging by the $217,000 they want for one. Luckily, if you're on a budget but still want something insane between your legs, they do offer a similar Kawasaki H2 for a mere $25,000. You'll need the savings to pay your medical bills after the inevitable crash.

Honda RC213V-S

If you want to ride a MotoGP down the street, you better have bail money at the ready, because it's not even close to legal. Luckily, Honda's got your back, with a totally street-legal take on the MotoGP: the 2016 Honda RC213V-S.

Based on the bike Marc Marquez rode to two MotoGP world titles, the RC looks and feels like a Moto, but Honda did stress to Cycle World that it's not nearly as powerful, because you don't need professional racing specs to ride to the store for milk. The engine "only" revs to 14,000 (9,400 if purchasing a US model, due to US restrictions on engine noise). But if you don't feel like the lord of the road with that kind of power, you never will. As for the price, you're looking at $184,000, plus $10-12,000 for a power-boosting kit. But you can't get that kit in America, because it's illegal. So if you really want one, you'll have to fly to Europe to get it yourself.

Oh, you'll also have to go back in time — this was a limited-edition model available in 2015 only. But since people will always have money to blow on what they don't need, it'd be surprising if Honda didn't roll out upgraded street-legal MotoGP replicas in the future.

NCR Mike Hailwood TT

Simply by looking at the NCR Mike Hailwood TT, you'd be hard-pressed to think it anything but wasteful. Between the weird, sitting-dog kickstand and off-brand Christmas colors, it just doesn't look like anything you'd want in your garage. And then you see the price tag — 100,000 Euro, or $118,000 — and you really start to wonder if any of the 12 bikes they made of this model went anywhere but the corner of the factory.

Created in honor of Mike Hailwood, who won the Isle of Man motorcycle racing event on a similar bike, the NCR-TT is really light, thanks to a body made mostly out of titanium. According to Motorcycle Specs, it's actually lighter than the one Hailwood used to win his championship, so maybe a title's in your future too. That is, if you can get past how weird and unpretty the bike looks. It's okay if you can't.

Nehmesis

For the ultimate in motorcycle excess, have a gander at the Nehmesis. It was created in 2007 by Sam Nehme, who owns BMS Choppers in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, as his dream vehicle. And like many a dream, it's brutally unrealistic. It's a gold-plated ode to WTF, with a back that looks like a giant snail, and a front wheel that's as tall as the body and at least three feet away. It's like a motorcycle crossed with a Caramello bar.

CNBC reports no actual specs, so probably this is just a weird-looking model. An expensive weird-looking model, however — the whole thing cost up to $500,000 to create, so if it were for sale it would probably run at least a million, possibly more. But alas, it's not for sale — the Nehmesis is Nehme's baby, and he wants to grow old with it. That almost makes sense: if you blow half a million dollars on a motorcycle and it doesn't even look like one, you're pretty much stuck with it for life.