Foods Astronauts Aren't Allowed To Eat In Space

It probably goes without saying that astronauts exploring the final frontier shouldn't eat beans because space smells on its own without humans adding their two scents, which would smell like a deuce and make the offending astronaut look like a deuce-bag. 

Popular Science explains that the universe reeks of dying stars that emit an aroma reminiscent of charcoal grills and diesel fuel. Astronauts on the International Space Station (ISS) have compared the scent of compounds lingering on their space suits to "burned" or "fried" steak. So no one should make a stink if you chow down on space 3D-printed space beef

Of course, olfactory comfort can't be the only consideration that decides an astronaut's menu. In fact, it might be a non-factor. Simply being in space leaves no room for certain foods on an astronaut's menu.

An astronaut's gastro-nots

According to How Stuff Works, the lack of gravity in space causes the fragrance of food to float away before reaching an astronaut's nose, inhibiting the ability to taste food. They can add condiments, but there are also restrictions to the forms those can take. To avoid having grains of salt and pepper all over the place, those spices have to be suspended in liquid. That pesky floating problem also leads to flavored drinks being packed in powdered form.

Per Space.com, one of the powdered drinks you won't find on the ISS is Tang. Astronauts used to drink it, which spawned the widespread misconception that NASA invented the stuff, but the agency only bought it as a convenient beverage. The legendary Buzz Aldrin wasn't sold, though, reportedly complaining that "Tang sucks." That suck-tasticness may explain why the drink is no longer offered on the ISS. There are also foods that wouldn't even work in theory, suck-tastic or not. The Franklin Institute names five, and surprisingly, none of them are beans.

You won't find bread aboard a space station due to its crumby composition and short shelf life. Instead, people eat tortillas. Booze is banned for astronauts because duh, but Russian cosmonauts imbibe a bit because also duh. Another no-no is soda, which retains carbon dioxide in low gravity, threatening to tie a person's stomach into astro-knots. The most surprising forbidden item might be astronaut ice cream, which despite having "astronaut" in the name would pose a space-place hazard. It's crumbly and brittle, and floating ice cream dust could interfere with equipment. The last thing any astronaut wants is to bite the dust in space, where no one can hear you scream for ice cream.