The Messed-Up Truth About Star Trek's Klingons

Klingons, Star Trek's iconic warrior race, are easily the franchise's most recognizable aliens without pointy ears. These Federation frenemies live for battle, cutting down their foes, headbutting their friends, and hoping above all for glorious deaths, worthy of song and Sto-vo-kor. Unlike those backstabbing Romulans or sniveling Ferengi, the Klingon heart is filled with honor, bloodlust, and joy. Warriors fill any room they enter, their voices proud, their calls for bloodwine loud, and their d'k tahgs ever-ready for the next p'takh foolish enough to challenge them.

At least, that's how it's supposed to work, but as with many things, there's more to the Alpha Quadrant's deadliest dramatists than meets the eye. They're warriors to be crossed at one's peril to be sure, but they're hardly one-dimensional space barbarians drinking and stabbing their way through the cosmos. The devotees of Kahless are much more nuanced than that, so let's take a deep dive into the messed up truth about Star Trek's Klingons.

Klingons aren't just burly people with fabulous foreheads, and one look at their internal anatomy proves it. Per Memory Alpha, their bodies can keep on going despite wound after wound due to brak'lul, which is the Klingon term for their innards' ubiquitous redundancy. They possess three lungs, two stomachs, two livers, a generous helping of ribs, and a big, strong eight-chambered heart, among other things. As pointed out by The Wrap, a shot of a Klingon urinating in an episode of Star Trek: Discovery shows two streams of urine hitting an unlucky wall. Make of that what you will.

Having two or more of just about everything means Klingons will survive injuries that would be fatal to weaker species ... or so it's stated. It hasn't always played out that way in the franchise, though. Our noble protagonists need to survive to spread the virtues of humanity another day, so plenty of Klingons, even important characters, have been depicted dying improbably quickly from mere stab wounds. Gowron, who was surely voted "Best War Face" in Klingon high school, fell to a pair of broken bat'leth tips courtesy of Worf, and Duras didn't fare much better, either.

The Klingons in Star Trek: Discovery went where no Klingon has gone before in terms of appearance. Not only were their foreheads ridged, but so was practically every surface on their bodies. Their long, flowing hair was gone, and some Klingons sported far more elongated skulls than had ever been portrayed previously. This is a bit of a problem when you consider that Discovery is part of the main Star Trek series timeline and takes place only around a decade before The Original Series.

As detailed by Ex Astris Scientia, the appearance change was due to the creators' desire to visually reimagine the Klingons. They even dialed it back in season two, such as with L'Rell, who had an elongated, hairless skull in the first season but suddenly had a more round head with plenty of hair and more Klingon-typical forehead ridges in the second. All the same, in-canon explanations for the Klingons' Discovery appearance don't come easily. Prominent ideas include that the Discovery look is but one in a series of mutations throughout history, that the Discovery Klingons are an otherwise isolated subspecies, or that viewers just have to imagine that the Klingons always looked like they do in Discovery, but one thing or another from Discovery and the other series can invalidate all of these notions. Maybe the Klingons synthesized a ridge-promoting medication and started taking way too much of it?

First impressions often have lasting effects, and that principle holds true for Klingons as well, albeit with their own predictably warlike spin. As told by Memory Alpha, in 2016, decades before humans had achieved warp drive, a Vulcan ship entered Klingon space and was promptly destroyed by the territorial warriors. Since, according to Sarek, "Vulcans don't make the same mistake twice," the normally peaceful space elves opened fire on the Klingons, immediately and without provocation, at every encounter thereafter, and as it turns out, that's a great way to say hello. Rather than starting a Vulcan-Klingon war, shooting at the Klingons earned the Vulcans their respect, and diplomatic relations were established.

On a related note, punching a Klingon is perfectly acceptable (although that's a door that presumably swings both ways). As shown in Deep Space Nine, good Klingon manners also include getting right up in another's face and speaking loudly. Do not, however, strike your new acquaintance with the back of your hand, as that's how you challenge a Klingon to a duel to the death.

Klingons are warriors everywhere, and the bedroom is no exception. Simply put, they like the kind of lovemaking that registers on seismographs. Now, that's not to say that they're clueless in the arts of seduction and foreplay. Just don't expect any of that to be gentle or subtle, either. According to Worf, a bloodcurdling scream (but not a roar) is a great way to woo a love interest. Once the encounter has started, a suitor might choose to recite love poetry while ducking hurled heavy objects. Per Memory Alpha, the act can also begin with the lovers clutching each other's hands hard enough to draw blood.

All that gentle foreplay can only lead to one thing ... broken bones. Klingon sex commonly ends with both participants sporting multiple fractures, and breaking a collarbone on a couple's wedding night is seen as a sign that the marriage is blessed. When Quark, possibly the first-ever Ferengi to make love to a Klingon, emerged from his encounter, he'd suffered a compound fracture to his right arm, as well as broken ribs, and was generally battered all over. In a similar vein, when Riker temporarily served aboard a Klingon ship, several of his new crewmates wondered how well he'd endure intimacy with the women on board.

You might have noticed that honor is everything for Klingons, especially where the manner of one's death is concerned. Life's a p'takh, however, and sometimes, through no fault of his own, a Klingon is left unable to act as a warrior any longer. When there's no more honor to be had, only the shame of burdening one's family, it is time for the Hegh'bat.

Per Memory Alpha, the Hegh'bat entails the family of a Klingon who's been incapacitated (by a paralyzing injury, for example) assisting him in ritual suicide. Ideally, the injured warrior's oldest son helps, and his role is to hand his father a blade. The father plunges it into his heart, after which the son removes the weapon and wipes the blood on his sleeve. The Hegh'bat isn't the only example of a son killing his father for reasons of honor, either. To be captured alive in battle is a great dishonor, and warriors who suffer this fate may hope that their sons will kill him should they ever meet again, as L'Kor hoped in the Next Generation episode "Birthright, Part II."

Based on how often they speak of honor, you'd think Klingons would care little for political intrigue, and you'd be right. All the same, the High Council, which leads the Klingon Empire, can absolutely be swayed by political concerns, as prominently exemplified in the Next Generation episode "Sins of the Father." In it, Worf learns from his long-lost brother, Kurn, that the Council has accused their father, Mogh, of betraying the Klingons to the Romulans at Khitomer, an action which led to an absolute massacre for the Klingons. Per the Star Trek Database, Worf himself was orphaned when Mogh died at Khitomer.

Worf, Kurn, and Captain Picard's investigation on Qo'noS, the Klingon homeworld, reveals a startling truth. They find a witness who can testify that it wasn't Mogh but another Klingon, Ja'rod, father of council member Duras, who betrayed his people. The witness, however, is prevented from testifying in open council, and K'mpec, leader of the Council, reveals the truth in private. The High Council already knows that Ja'rod was the real traitor, but Duras' family is too powerful, and exposing the crimes of his father would lead to civil war. Therefore, Mogh is officially a traitor, and his dishonor passes to Worf, who accepts discommendation in order to protect both the empire and his brother.