The time Justin Bieber was part of a murder plot

Justin Bieber has definitely come a long way from his Ontario, Canada roots since his first YouTube videos blew up over a decade ago. As MTV says, those videos (and a signature hairstyle, of course) were all that was necessary for Usher and Justin Timberlake to duke it out for who could sign Bieber and catapult him to overnight stardom. With fame — and especially fast fame — come a lot of jealousy and hate, and the Biebs has definitely received an absolute ton of hate over the years (warranted or not). As an article on Vocal Media outlines, lots of these reasons don't have anything to do with Bieber's music, and more to do with his obtuse or arrogant behavior (such as writing in the Anne Frank House guest book, "Hopefully she would have been a belieber," as the BBC reported in 2013).

Love him or hate him, though, Bieber definitely didn't deserve what convicted rapist and murderer Dana Martin was plotting to do to him back in 2013. In a truly unbeliebable display of psychopathy and cruelty, Martin convinced fellow inmate Mark Staake to not only murder Bieber, but castrate him, as The Atlantic states. How, you ask? Garden shears. They got Staake's nephew, Tanner Ruane, on board, and Martin promised them a payment of $2,500 per testicle. Oh yeah, and also, unrelatedly, Martin wanted them to castrate the two dudes who were responsible for his incarceration. Which seems excessive, doesn't it?

A Chinese heroin gang, some Ferraris, and a Canadian rescue

What's the rationale for this heinous emasculation of a Canadian treasure? Allegedly, it's because Martin just loved the Biebs so gosh-darn much. Or, in his own words, "What are you trying to get me to say, that I love Justin Bieber and think he's gorgeous? He's a good-looking kid. Would I go to bed with him? Yeah. He's legal, so probably." Charming. While in prison, this zealous preoccupation with Bieber led Martin to get a homemade tattoo of Biebs on his leg, made with a makeshift tattoo gun. But as soon as Bieber started his "awkward Vanilla Ice–like embrace of hip-hop slang" and speeding "around Los Angeles in a $230,000 white Ferrari 458 Italia," Martin turned all judgy. So, you know, he figured he'd have Bieber castrated and murdered.

Martin served time together with Staake, and puffed up his reputation with tales of murders he never committed. He convinced Staake to go along with his plot against Bieber by weaving a story about a "Chinese heroin gang and promises of $50,000, a free Ferrari, and the deed to a farm previously owned by Michael J. Fox." Yeah, you thought this wasn't going to get crazier? In the end, as The Guardian says, Staake and Ruane botched the job by missing their highway exit and crossing into, irony of ironies, Canada, where they were pulled over by the authorities and detained. Good on you, Canada, for staying true Beliebers.